When I first read this assignment the other night I thought “mmmm…I love coffee dates! How fun to get caught up over one.” I thought of great little tidbits I could share and things to laugh over, but then the night happened. It was a rough one and I thought about not doing this assignment at all afterwards because how can I write from the heart and be me when I don’t want to share my heartache just now. I changed my mind and here is how our ‘coffee date’ would go.
Unfortunately, I would be that friend I hate to be. It was a rough night and I am a little hurt. Enough that I don’t really want to see or talk to anyone because I’m afraid they will see it in my eyes or hear it in my voice. I don’t want questions I can’t answer or sympathetic looks I don’t need. So, I would call you (actually probably text you) with some excuse for why I can’t make it to our coffee date. “Hey, you…so sorry I have to cancel. Some stuff came up, but can we do it next week?” or “I’m sorry things are a little crazy this morning…I have to flake, but next time for sure.” I flake out big time and plan to just sit in my pajamas alone and lick my wounds so to speak.
What I’m secretly hoping is that you remember that I’m not normally that person that flakes. That if I really had to, I’d be the one to give an actual reason not a generic apology. And maybe you think about it and realize what I really need right now is exactly what I just flaked on. I’m secretly hoping you show up at my door with a big smile and a non-fat latte (with a hint of irish cream and a pinch of hazelnut) ready to be whatever I need. Maybe you say something like “Well hello! If you don’t have time I totally understand, but nobody can start the day without a good latte.” You remember I don’t like to be touched too much and don’t even try that awkward hug, no sympathy in your eyes and not a single question. Instead, you catch me up on your life. You share your own little tid bits and after awhile have me laughing and smiling over your funny stories. You get up to leave after awhile. Still no questions asked and no offers to help (because you already have). I break my boundaries and hug you. Thank you. Because that was exactly what I needed. I needed to forget my own heartache for a little while and now the day doesn’t seem quite so daunting.
Thank you all for sharing your stories in writing 101…it is like I have had a ‘coffee date’ with so many of you. I have laughed and smiled and felt emotions right along with you and that has helped me smile and heal a little quicker.